To: Bhau’s Dear Ones
By email:
Date: May 14, 2001
Subject: Bhau’s first "Awakening" of May 14th - Your
Helplessness Will Make You Laugh / Few Actors Can
Follow The Director’s Instructions

From Bhau:

This morning [May 14th], I took a walk for 20 minutes. Then I was sitting on the porch, where I had my breakfast. The morning was very fresh. A breeze was there, and I was very happy with the morning walk around Sheela’s house.

Then I went to my room. Freeman brought the emails, and I dictated replies. Then Sheela asked me to take a bath.

Freeman and Max were making arrangements to change my colostomy. I was lying in bed, and all of a sudden, a thought came in my mind, "Oh Baba, how helpless I have become! I depend upon others for everything. Day by day, this dependence goes on increasing."

A voice came in my heart, as if Baba Himself were speaking, "Helpless? You have not yet become completely helpless. When you become completely helpless, you will not feel sorry. You will not feel sad. On the contrary, your helplessness will make you laugh. That is helplessness. You have no idea what you gain through your helplessness. You get inner strength. Physically you are ruined, but internally you are strong. Still you have to become more and more strong. The time has come for that.

"You are My trusted one. My Mandali members are My trusted ones. I can trust them, because if anything happens, their faith in Me will not shake. They have rock-like faith in Me, and therefore I rely on them. They are My asset. They are the medium of My Universal Work. I torture them to any extent, but their love remains just the same. On the contrary, they love Me more and more. I am their strength, and I am the only One on Whom they rely. Such persons now I will have after 700 years, when I come back. No one can replace them.

"Then there is another category who love Me. But their love and faith are not as strong as My Mandali members, whom I use for My Universal Work. There also are real lovers. The category of these lovers is separate.

"For example, Perfect Master Ramdas had a disciple named Kalyan, who was not in his circle. The circle members were different, but Kalyan loved Ramdas very much.

"One day, Swami Ramdas came to his mandali. Kalyan was there. Ramdas had a bandage on his leg, and he said, ‘I have got a terrible wound on my leg. The pain is unbearable. The pus is there in the wound, and the only way to relieve me from the pain is to suck the pus.’

No circle member came forward, so Kalyan started sucking the pus. But the swelling was actually a mango which Swami Ramdas had tied within the bandage.

"The difference between the circle members and lovers is that circle members are used for Universal Work, while lovers are not. But such lovers are rare.

"There is another category. They are in the first stage of love, called ‘Emotion.’ They appear as if they love Me more and more, and there is no equal to them. So they exhibit show. For that purpose they will go to any extent. They may act as if they love Me more than My circle members, but they do not hesitate to torture them.

"Then there are other categories who do not know Me. They remain busy with their own religions as they become orthodox. They remain very, very rigid. If they come to know about Me, they abuse Me and criticize Me.

"The other category is atheist. They have nothing to do with God. They don’t care for God. They don’t believe in the existence of God. Yet the responsibility of all these people I have taken on. I am responsible for everyone. I am the director, producer and actor of the film of Creation. Therefore I have to play these three roles for everyone and everything.

"Everyone is an actor in Creation, and he or she acts according to his or her impressions or sanskaras. These sanskaras are the bindings, so he or she remains bound by these sanskaras. As I am responsible for all this, it is My duty to release them. So I have to play the role of director, producer and actor in everyone.

"But there are a few actors who can follow the instruction of the director. So the director relies upon them. He gives them any instruction without any hesitation, so that they may act to help others. I take upon the burden of their sanskaras by giving them vidyanic sanskaras. These vidyanic sanskaras can wipe out their binding sanskaras. Then I use these few actors for My Universal Work. They are My trusted ones.

"The real lovers who do not expect anything from Me, remain dedicated to Me, and surrender to Me, they are also My trusted ones. But for others I have to work, and work and work, and suffer and suffer and suffer to make them the best actors so that they may not remain bound by their acting, but to remain bound with My pleasure. I suffer infinitely for them. I have to act very, very carefully with them, because they have a lot of burden from their own sanskaras.

"The emotional ones exhibit their emotion, but then they do not hesitate to torture My lovers and circle members in order to show their love. I have to put up with all of them because they are My children. So My circle members not only are tortured by those who criticize and abuse Me, but they are also tortured by the emotional ones. Still I have to put up with them, because they are My children.

"Therefore Bhau, I tell you, you are passing through different things because you are tortured. Don’t worry, you are My trusted one. I know how you have established the Trust. How after I dropped My body, in order to fulfill My instructions, you wrote many books, working continuously day and night. Then you took up the Trust work . I know how difficult it was to establish the Trust under the law, but you did it. How did you do it? Because I did it Myself through you. You are My medium, and now you are spending all your energy for the development of the Trust.

"You are also careful, like My other Mandali Members, who never have any distinction of race, religion, caste, creed, sex or nationality. You realize that I am in them, and I only exist. Because you work for Me, in order to serve My cause, you keep all these distinctions away and never think of duality. You always think about Unity, because you, like all My Mandali Members, are My trusted ones.

"So do not lose heart and go on serving Me in a way which you think is under My Wish. I am with you, and I will never fail you. You may be proved a complete failure by the world. But I tell you, you are winning in My love. I trust you. What more do you want?"

This happened here, when Freeman and Max were changing my colostomy. Then I was taking a bath,. Just after my bath, I started dictating, first to Freeman and then to Max.

One thing Beloved Baba also told Me through His silent voice in my heart, "How much care I take for you. Have you any idea? You got heart trouble. Immediately, Anne, Freeman, Max, and your Shiva came to help you. There were others also to help you. Then, next Sheela and David came from America. They all have been helping you. So I do not neglect you. Though I am making you helpless, at the same time I provide help to you.

"You just see. A wave has become very strong in My Ocean, and all My lovers have become one. Because of their love for Me, they have become your strength. I am really very, very happy that you are offering their love to Me at My Samadhi and at the Dhuni. I feel proud of you. Know well, I am extremely pleased with you, because you salute and bow down to the love of My lovers which they have for me. So now, knowing fully well that I am your strength, and your helplessness is such that, it is giving you more and more strength, you be happy and cheerful.

"Again, I feel extremely happy to see that you offer flowers for my lovers in the Dhuni. I heard your prayer for them. I feel touched, and I feel happy."

With all love and Jai Baba to you,

In His Love and Service,

Bhau Meherabad Monday, 14th May, 2001

Ps. Coming very soon, ‘Eruch Is My Peter’ / ‘Bhau Is My John,’ followed by When that Time Comes, Nobody Will Know What to Do and What Not to Do